Staff Lunch Review: Burger King’s Mac n’ Cheetos
With the addition of just one new buzzworthy novelty menu item, it appears that good ol’ trusty Burger King has maintained their place in the fast food midsummer palate absurdity category.
And, we’re just going to assume Burger King’s fresh announcement of the Mac n’ Cheetos will experience the same short-lived fate of previous fast food dysentery-induced ploys, like the McSpaghetti and that of its deceased sibling, the McLobster.
So, instead of you giving this brilliantly processed gambit a whirl, a few of us over at RFHQ headed to the nearest BK to first-handedly experience the summation of two-and-half-centuries of American culinary refinement.
And our reviews are in:
Riot Fest Twitter Guy: “Mac n’ Cheetos are the sweatpants of the fast food world. You know the message you’re sending out to the world when you order Mac n’ Cheetos™? You’re telling the world, ‘I give up. I can’t compete in normal society. I’m miserable, so I might as well be comfortable.”
Emily (RF CRAFT SERVICES): “Creamy, noodley inside with a delicate Cheetos crust. Brilliant.”
Dan (RF PROFESSIONAL DOODLER) : “I’d like to take a vacation day, order five boxes of these, pour them all into a mixing bowl, and eat them on my couch while I marathon through all three Lord of the Rings films. Then I’d like to take a sick day.”
Christina (RF TOKEN MILLENNIAL): “The best thing to happen to my drunk self since Taco Bell Fourth Meal.”
Riot Mike: (Mike refused to eat one.) “That’s fucking gross.”
Buck (RF JUNIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE): “I’ve put worse things in my mouth.”
Riot Fest Mom: “If you put this much salt in anything it will taste fantastic. I can feel my ankles swelling already.”
Jen (RF JANITOR): “You can really taste the regret in every bite.”
JAKE (RF JUNIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE): “No comment”